How to have a good marriage

 Do you feel that happiness has faded in your marriage?  If you can’t imagine how you got to this point and wonder how to have a good marriage, here are a few tips to help you get through.

First of all, in order to live a happy married life, it is essential to accept your spouse the way they are. If you’re feeling angry or upset because of the way they deal with different matters in life, you need to sit down and take a few deep breaths to calm yourself down. It’s not always easy to see past minor annoyances, and at times you may even hate your partner. But to have a happy marriage you have to accept your partner’s strengths and weaknesses and be able to set realistic expectations. For example, if your strength is your good memory, don’t get angry if they forget special dates. Instead, make it your job to set reminders in different ways. If their strength is cooking, they can manage meal planning instead. That’s how I manage to deal with my husband forgetting our anniversary.

Second, it’s important to share common interests and have fun together so that you can strengthen the bond and evolve together. Whether it’s a love of travel, a strong desire to build a family together, a dedication to a common cause, or even just watching your favourite TV series together, these experiences can help you to connect with your spouse and enrich your relationship. Personally, I’ve found that volunteering at the church on Sunday mornings has helped us to increase our bond by creating a sense of connection.

Last but not least, you need to be kind, respectful and understanding of your spouse. If you are critical and judgmental it usually ends in defensiveness and resentment. So to keep things happy within the marriage, avoid swearing and attacking your partner’s behaviour when you're upset. Even better, before arguing about anything, - for example, who will clean up the dishes after dinner- you might say something like, “what about if I cook and you wash the dishes tonight? How does that sound?” In doing so, you'll show a team-work attitude and appreciation for their co-operation.

With these ideas in mind, you can help avoid marital discord, and you might even get closer than ever. After all, this is supposed to be your soulmate, right?